How painful is the pain?

“You will never know true happiness until you have truly loved, and you will never understand what pain really is until you have lost it.”

How painful is the pain? well for me, pain is too much when your whole being is too numb and you could no longer feel the hurt, you could no longer think and your entire being is so empty. Pain is too much when you want to cry but nothing will come out from your eyes...
Much painful when you want to shout to release that heavy feeling, but you cannot even shout.  Pain is too painful when you die yet you still live.


People say:

Love is like a bond. It makes you feel great when you have it... 

Love help you up when you are down... 

Just to push you back down again!

Others say love is a feeling two people share,
Some say love is a game..., 

But I say:
Love is pain that we have to embrace. There goes the saying "No pain, no gain" so without embracing it, we can't go on living, after all, we are born to love and to be loved. No matter how painful the pain is, we have to go on loving. Yeah, love teaches us pain, and once the feeling of love goes, we all try so hard to feel it again.. life is so ironic. (sighs)    


Everyday, along my journey, I am always yearning for that real love. I am too focused of my feelings without considering the feelings of that someone whom I claimed I have loved, to the extent that he might got  suffocate of my behavior. I am too centered on my beliefs and conclusions, all because of jealousy.

I asked myself several times of why I always get jealous. Maybe I have grounds or bases of that jealousy, but, it will not justify to tolerate myself from messing up.  Still the fact remains that too much of it will suffocate a person. Too much of it will draw a person away from you. I just discovered it today, and it isn't too late :) 

I am used to pain. I just wish that someday, along the way, I feel no pain.